Friends and Bipolar Disorder

I have suffered the symptoms of Bipolar Disorder for 27 years. I was diagnosed almost 24 years ago after a long search for an answer. I have only had two major manic episodes since diagnosis, both caused by stopping my medication. The reasons for stopping medication seem trivial now. My biggest regret is the loss of good friends. At times, I tried to explain that I was ill but it didn't seem to help. Someone said recently that Bipolar sufferers tend to say sorry a lot. Some friends were hit full force by my manias. Some suffered the after effects but they all drifted away. Some may stay in touch at Christmas and some may send the occasional email. My friends now are either fellow sufferers or support workers. I am still inclined to be open with certain people, especially if I like them and I wouldn't want them to find out some other way. This may seem reckless but that's the way I am. I am still seeking email friends, if only to balance some of the spam.