Monday, 16 March 2009

My story - The Conclusions

I thought my book should have a conclusion. I talk to the publisher tomorrow to get the show on the road. I am so excited and positive. I hope you find my conclusions helpful and not too preachy:


I have written my story for a variety of reasons. One of these was an attempt to exorcise my own demons. In this respect, I have been successful. I was always blocked on certain parts of my life. This prevented me from getting to the crux of my life. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my chest.

I sincerely hope that my story will be of help to fellow sufferers and their loved ones. I have gained a lot of insight over the years and I finally feel that I am the master over the illness.

I encourage all sufferers to take responsibility for their illness and their behaviour. It is a cheap shot to blame the illness for everything. It may be the root cause but it does not have to lead to chaos. You all take decisions regarding your illness. Some would say that the highs are good and hard to give up. Remember the down moods and remember the shattered friendships. It is almost impossible to build bridges after you have hurt so many people. ?It is the Illness? doesn?t cut it in the long term.

Medications don?t help everyone fully but they are a start. Please take them religiously. I have learnt over the years how to spot my mood upswings and I can take the sting out of them. It involves an interest in helping yourself. I always looked for a diagnosis and a solution. This started weeks after my first manic episode. I never sought to prolong my elated moods. They may have been intoxicating but ultimately they were destructive. In mania, you don?t empathise with others. This doesn?t mean you have to act that way in all situations.

Friends and family will be loath to support you if you do not control your illness. It is not easy but it is possible. Take responsibility.

I have just managed to prevent a hypomania from escalating into mania. I have pushed myself hard in writing this story. I think it has been worth it and I am much calmer as a result. As I approach the publishing process, I feel a great hope. Unfortunately I am exhausted. I think it is worth it because the result will help many sufferers and their families. The story had to come out. I know that because of the way I feel now.

I hope you enjoyed the story. I lived it. Good luck, everyone.


  1. Clive,

    I hope you are able to relax now that your book is finished. How long will it take to turn it into print?

    Just carrying on from where we left off talking about music and moods..

  2. I am so proud of you. It's not easy putting thoughts into words or exposing and expressing yourself. I am so excited for you! Good luck~


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